BENEFITING: WISHBONE FOUNDATION
EVENT DATE: Jun 13, 2014
When we found out I was pregnant with Camden we were so excited and ready for the next 8 months to fly by so we could hold our baby. I was ready for the late night feedings, stinky diapers, and all that comes with having a baby. At 26 weeks we went in for my glucose test and a follow up ultrasound. It was then that we were told my amniotic fluid was on the low side and they sent us to the ER at Skyridge to get a second opinion. With another ultrasound, we met the doctor and she told us that my placenta was bad and the blood flowing through the umbilical cord to Camden wasn't constant the way it needed to be to nourish our son and help him grow. Because Camden was only 26 weeks gestational age, the doctor recommended we be transferred to PSL because they had a higher level NICU for him to be treated. Within a few short hours our happiness of getting to see Camden through another ultrasound turned to fear. It was on April 1st that we were told it was the doctor's opinion that Camden had a better chance of survival being delivered at 26 weeks than staying inside my body any longer. We heard so much medical jargon, our heads were spinning. They told us he would be small, his skin would be transparent, and he wouldn't cry. After an emergency c-section, Camden was born weighing 1lb 5oz and 12 inches long. He cried and fought the nurses trying to intubate him. His cries sounded like a kitten. We were in love and ready to take on the world for him. Over the next 11 days we learned the ins and outs of the NICU. We took turns with care times, changing his diaper, and taking his temperature. While I pumped I would email family and friends pictures while detailing our days. I would google micro-premie baby clothes and wonder how long we would be in the NICU. It honestly never crossed my mind that Camden wouldn't come home with us, that he wouldn't grow up. On April 9th I was able to hold Camden, skin to skin for an hour. To feel him on my chest was amazing and I couldn't wait for the next time so Kyle could experience it also. The next day, we noticed Camden's belly was distended. The NICU doctors started tests and antibiotics for a possible infection and gave us various scenarios of what could happen. For the first time that night I worried that we wouldn't ever hold Camden again. I called his nurse every 2 hours to check on him and through the night and most of the next day Camden held his own fighting an unknown infection. On April 11th we watched as Camden struggled to live. He had more tubes running into his little body than he ever had before. He was swollen to almost double his size. As we walked through the NICU that evening I noticed how people looked at us with such sad eyes. We were handed 3 different boxes of Kleenex and a screen put up around us to give is privacy. It was then, before we had heard from Camden's doctor that we knew his health was fading and our worst fears were coming true. We had Camden baptized that evening and then the nurse placed him in our arms, for the first time without any tubes. We took turns holding him and praying over him as he took his last breath. Camden's doctor touched his head and apologized to him for not being able to do more to heal him. It felt surreal and walking out of the hospital for the last time, so unlike how I had imagined we would leave, was incredibly hard. We had been so focused on being apart of Camden's life in the NICU and now we didn't know what to do with ourselves. There were no more care times, diaper changes, feedings. We had a funeral to plan when we should've been planning his nursery.
It was through a mutual friend that we met Amy Camp and heard of the Wishbone foundation. We've had the pleasure of being a part of a Wishbone parent panel and telling our story in hopes that it may make a difference in how a nurse cares for a family going through such a devastating loss. We are so blessed to be a part of the Wishbone's annual golf tournament and help raise money so they can continue to train the hospital staff that we as parents rely on.
The Wishbone Foundation
Our mission is to provide training and resources to nurses and their labor and delivery teams who support grieving families experiencing miscarriage, stillborn and early infant death
The death of an infant is one of the most devastating experiences a family can have, and the grief a parent endures is immeasurable. Having the support and care of a well trained labor and delivery bereavement team that is prepared to handle the situation is critical during this tragic time.
Not all hospitals have teams equipped to support the families that lose a child before, during or shortly after birth.
For those who lose a child at a hospital with a trained team, it’s an invaluable resource that provides strength, courage and hope to families. We strive to provide all families with that level of support.
To learn more about Wishbone Foundation, visit www.wishbonefoundation.org