It's been a bumpy road, 1 week to go
May 01, 2017
EVENT DATE: May 07, 2017
I am running my first marathon and I thought that running for a cause would make this journey a lot more meaningful to me and, hopefully, inspiring for others. I chose an organization that works for a cause very close to my heart (and mind): Canadian Mental Health Association. As some of you know, I was diagnosed with chronic depression and anxiety back in 2008, during my first year of university back in Mexicali, but things started way before that.
For as long as I can remember, I had always been a girl that would cry and stress out when things got difficult which sounds like nothing out of the ordinary, specially considering the fact that I was usually involved in many extracurricular activities. But the thing is that at times I would definitely feel a bit crazy during what I started calling my "crisis". I would feel like curling in a ball in some corner in my house crying my lungs out, I wanted to be alone but needed to be hugged, I would feel like hitting myself (and at times I would), I found myself wanting to die because 'everything' was overwhelming, just too much. And even though I wasn't, I just felt completely lonely. I thought this was just who I was and never thought there was anything that had to be fixed.
One night I was at a worship service when the leader asked those who needed healing to step forward. For the first time I realized maybe my ‘crises’ were not normal so I prayed to God for help and I knew something happened that night. The next day I still had another moment. Like other times my mom was there with me but for the first time she mentioned going to a doctor. A few days later a psychiatrist would diagnose me with chronic depression and anxiety. At first I was reluctant to take any medications, "God is going to heal me", I said. It was not long before I realized that God had 'told' my mom to take me to the doctor, that's how He was healing me. After that, things progressively started to get better, I felt like a curtain had open just in front of my eyes. Life was easier: it was easier being around people, it was easier to cope with stress and difficult situations and I started working on my perfectionism with a psychologist.
I am still on medication, I have been on and off since then. My hope is that I will be able to live without it at some point as I know it is possible but I know I might need to take it for good. When a good friend of mine found out I was on medication, he opened up about how depression had affected his marriage. Unfortunately he did not know he had depression until it was too late. He encouraged me to be serious about taking my pills as depression doesn’t just affect me. I could tell how much he wished he had known about his depression sooner. Since then, I became more serious about the whole thing: I take my medication regularly, I make sure I sleep and exercise enough and I am willing to talk to others about it. Why? My husband Jamie and my 5-month old Nicholas are my biggest motivation to stay healthy.
Throughout my journey, I was blessed to receive helped of people that love me. After being diagnosed and learning about depression, its treatments and other things I can change in my life to increase my mental health without involving medications, I am a true advocate of creating awareness to prevent and treat any mental disorders.
Please get involved and help me support CANADIAN MENTAL HEALTH ASSOCIATION! Any amount is welcome but I encourage you to be generous and donate to this or any cause that you believe in. Thanks for reading and cheering me on!