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Child Depression is REAL

Organized by: Christina Marie

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THE STORY:

I have one son. One. I had a husband who used to mask his abuse so well, that I felt it, but I couldn't show it. Then it got worse, and worse, and it took all I had to accept that it was going to have to end. Because it was no longer hurting me, but it was now hurting my son. That is a massive pain. I started noticing Christopher shutting down about a year ago but I tried to wait and think maybe he's just at a hard age, he's 9 now. What didn't go away I noticed him isolating I noticed him daydreaming the smiles became less often and he became more quiet. Maybe he misses his dad which I'm sure he does but it's not that... What I failed to notice while I was caught in the chaos that was my marriage, was that he was seeing it all, front row. They call it depression, and when a child is born with a mom or dad or BOTH who struggle with it, they are much more at risk. They call it Trauma, repeated occurrences that cause feelings of endangerment and worthlessness. I believe I saw the shift that he went thru when his brain literally gave out and changed because it could no longer take in anymore. There's nothing more painful than having to watch my son not understand or withdrawal or struggle to fix something that he did not break. He is in testing and evaluation with a great therapist. But as a single mom now, I can't afford much more with these costs. It's a long road and a slow process, and cheering him up seems to suck the intelligence out of me and I finish drained. I need him to know the world is NOT a bad place to live in, and that Love does NOT hurt, and that He is NOT invisible. I'd like to surprise him with a few special "wishes" he's put off year after year.... A treehouse (without the tree) his bed is still toddler sized and broken on one side, I'd like to get him an age appropriate bunk bed finally, and he would like to take a trip. I can not do it alone tho. I never knew my struggle, would be his. Thank god he is so much braver, and stronger than I am. I know he will kick depression and alllll these mental health issues in the ass! I love you Christopher

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Organized by

Christina Marie

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