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Steven Coach

Steven Coach
Eureka, CA United States
Stuff About Me:

Since I was born it seems I was a challenge to my mom. She used to tell me once, "I hope you have a son just like you!" I thought that would be great -- until O got older and realized how much I put my mom through. One day when I was in my 40's I was beset by a metabolic disorder that changed my life forever. Where I had been a very active and self-reliance and independent man, suddenly I was being told by my doctor, "You symptoms are normal for an 80-year old man!" That was the beginning of the toughest season of my life. The disorder prevents normal living. Pain and exhaustion become the normal daily expectation, but life goes on. I lost everything that meant anything to me in life -- or so it seemed. When I finally pulled out of the depression I began to explore what was still possible for me to do. As I set and met new goals I began to realize that it wasn't the end of life. It was just the beginning of a life very different than the one I left behind. Part of my new life was to become a resource of support for my mom. It was time to give back. My sister was very supportive of mom. When my sister passed in 2004 of a rare lung disorder, mom was devastated. Moms aren't supposed to outlive their children, and she had lost two of them. I lived in Southern California. Mom lived in Northern California. I determined that as soon as I could arrange it, I would relocate to be near her. I have spent the last eleven years now helping to take care of mom in every way that I could -- running errands, taking her out, getting her to appointments, regular phone calls, emails, and visits, working on her computer when it isn't working right, and many other small ways. She had to give up her car some years ago. I have watched as she has become older and weaker. It is hard to realize that there is only so much I can do to help her. One of the things I have been able to do is to help keep up her morale. That has been no small thing for her. Recently I took her for some frozen yogurt. Then we ran some errands. I asked her if she wanted to go for a short drive. She has expressed that she would appreciate getting out of her apartment "on her good days." They are getting fewer. We drove out to the coast where she very much enjoyed the fresh air, the change of scenery, and the afternoon breeze. When we got back home, and for the next few days I could see in her how much it did for her to get out and around. It has become something more important than I realized. She is having more and more trouble getting into my car. From time to time we have talked about doing something that would allow her to experience outings with her electric scooter so that she can do more than sit in the car, and take only a few steps. Walking is becoming a challenge for her now, even though she is still able (and determined) to live independently. I realize that this is the time for me to get serious about making an accommodation for mom to be able to get out more and to move around with the help of her scooter. The best solution I have come up with after some few years of consideration is to purchase a vehicle that will accomodate her scooter. (My car is too small.) I have put off having to deal with this because since the onset of my disorder I have lived a very bare existence on disability. In spite of everything I have tried to become self-sustaining and off of disability, I have not yet found a solution that works with my circumstances. I don't want my life's limitations to prevent me from providing support for my mom. She deserves better, and at this point in her life, it has become one of the most important thingsw I can do for her. My hope is that enough people will feel moved to help that I can make this happen for my mom in a timely manner. Crowdfunding is the only way I have at this point to make this happen. I have not used crowdfunding before so I cannot say that I really know what I am doing, but that hasn't stopped me from making the effort. Mom is worth it. Thanks. Steve



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