Vickie gilbert

Organized by: Vickie Gilbert

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I was hoping to find some help on this page ..I suffer from depression and what keeps me going is my animals.there the one that get me going and a reason to live.3mo this week I had to put down not only one german shepherds but 2.also cat that had kidney failure..zooka went because she had cancer and I didn't even know until blood came out of her that day.. I just adopted her five months prior to her dying what a shock to me.then yasko he had bad hips I did everything I could for him but it came to a point I just couldn't pick him up to go out side anymore my back is very bad he was suppose to go last winter but instead I did everything for him to keep him alive uncomfortable as best as I could he was a happy boy even though he had bad hips very bright and alert the day he passed or should I say before he did never in my life have I seen that dog had tears running down his face that memory will stay forever in my mind. If anybody's ever had an animal they always sedate them first the gut feeling I had when he was staring at me with tears was don't do it mom please I don't want to go yet that was the feeling I had but I had to do what I had to I couldn't do it anymore.the vet said he was as healthy as a horse but it was his hips that were bad that's why I had to put him down he wasn't in any pain because he didn't feel anything ..I took care of him as best as I could I wasn't ready to be all alone . then his favorite little kitty cat sassy she had a bad kidney failure those two are two peas in a pod they did everything together they slept together they went the same day .they are buried together in each other's arms now that to me was the right thing to do..without him I feel lost and empty and hope less I cry behind close doors with out anyone knowing .at night thank God I do have my look at so quiet too quiet in this house I can not stand it they gave me a reason to live and get up each and every morning they put a smile on my face. now I am so lost everything that I loved is gone ..and I don't have the money to do it so please if anybody could help me find another one to love I would very appreciate it so much .I never had children before I've only ever had animals they're my life they're the ones that I live for each and every day if you can find it in your heart please donate.. one thing I was lucky to do a to do list for my last dog before he passed he went everywhere with me know he is gone he was my protektor my husband travels and never ever home .. I was attacked many years ago and that is still in the back of my head I feel safe when they are around because I don't have to worried about somebody coming in when I'm home all alone because of the big dogs barking if have never been intact you will never understand what I go through everyday and every night especially nights alone. ..zooka I just adopted her five months before this and she died of cancer that was shocking and such a heartbreak to me I'm still trying to get over this I can't even believe this happened one week I lost three animals I'm on disability and I cannot afford to buy one they're so expensive anymore.. some people have children my children are my animals in my life some people don't believe animals are your children but they are very much so .. thank for carrying ..


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