When She Flies Birthday Party
Organized by: Mary Lee Lambert
One pair of shoes.
One picture album
. Ten dollars.
These were the only things I brought with me when I left my home six years ago. You see, the previous evening, December 13th 2010, I died. I laid on our living room floor and counted my fingers with my eyes closed, too scared to look and see the damage. In 24 hours my old life was stripped from me and it slowly rebirthed a new one. I was lucky, though. I had my family, and my boys.
Six years, a lot of counseling, and even more forgiveness later, I have to say that being in my toxic relationship was not the hard part.
My abuse did not end with leaving, there was a very real point that I crossed over and went from victim, into my own abuser. I didn't need to be hit or put down or etc. anymore, I did it to myself, constantly.
We started so young; I didn't even remember who I was before him. However, being a victim was fairly simple. I knew how to be a wife and mother. I knew what he liked in his coffee and which outfit I should change into before he came home from work. I knew not to ask if he could please cut the grass so the boys could play in the back yard or how much I could spend on groceries so he wouldn't be angry.
But, being a person outside of a couple? Me without him? A woman not a wife? Well I had no idea how to be that! I had long given in to the notion that I must be horrible or crazy and I could not trust my own thoughts, feelings, nor choices.
Perhaps if I had, had a life outside of our home the manipulation would of been clearer. But I didn't. And it wasnt. Now being all me, is truly the best revenge ever. But healing takes time and the world is not kind to women who voice their abuse.
Fortunately for me, what once was an obstacle I had to get over, has become a call that pursued me. A few years back I started my own online business and this year a philanthropic project has been brewing. I called/call it When She Flies and soon it will become a certified nonprofit.
We advocate for domestic violence survivors, raise funds for education and books, have ongoing gently used "back-to-work-ware" donation drives, plan and attend events, and operate a mobile boutique to which sales are donated to local programs in support of giving survivors a fresh start.
This month I will also be ushering in my year 31. For this occasion I've decided to celebrate in an unorthodox way. I am beyond grateful for my own life and want others to know So, I am humbly asking you to consider giving a small pledge or one time gift in support of this mission. I will also be selling my jewelry at various locations.
Please consider giving and sharing with your friends, family, and followers!
You see, When She Flies, she wins!